New Blog

This is mostly for Grandma's and anyone who wants way too know much info on my fam that I have started a new blog. The blog name is toyouloveme.blogspot.com you can go to it if you click here. I realized I haven't been using my blog very much because what I wanted to write was probably not what people were interested in. I don't have a lot of time and so the time I did have I wanted to spend in some sort of way keeping a journal for my sweet little kids about how amazing, silly, and fun they are and all of our wonderful experiences. I started this new one to do exactly that. It might be boring but I thought some of the Grandmas (and Grandpas) might enjoy...and anyone else who is interested...because I will keep stories about and things my kids do. However it is written in letter format to my kiddos, so keep that in mind. I am not writing to anyone but them. I am hoping at the end of the year to have it made into a book so that we can keep it. Let's see how it goes.

I will still update this blog but with more of the things that interest me, besides my kids. Love you all!

Josalyn

5 Months
What?
I guess since I am still stuck in July the idea that this little girl is 5 months old is hard for me to wrap my brain around too, but alas she is.

Though small in size she has taken over this family and changed our hearts. It is amazing how much love she has brought into our home. Not that we didn't have any before I guess we just didn't realize how much more would come just by having her here. She is the soft spot in everyone heart. We all can be grouchy and grumpy with each other....not that we ever are....but as soon as anyone sees Josalyn it is all smile and laughter. No one can be grouchy when she is around. I love that she has that effect on everyone.

She still is a tiny thing. Only weighing in at 13 lbs. but she has a ton of personality and smiles for all. She loves to play. I have been trying snuggle her a lot and carry her around in my sling but she will just whine and moan until I but her in her bouncy seat and then she sits and plays with her toys contently. I am getting the message. Toys are way more fun than me. She isn't the only one who thinks that.


She has lots of nicknames: Josy Bean, Josi, Joe, Joe-Joe, Ho Jo, and most recently when Kate discovered that baby Kangaroos are called joeys she started calling her Joey and now are all called Mom Kangaroo, Daddy Kangaroo, etc. It was fun to see her put that together.

Anyway Joe we love you and love having you here but please stop growing!

Christmas in July

It really doesn't feel like December. I just can't wrap my brain around Christmas right now. I am almost done with all my shopping but when we started getting out our good old Christmas decor and went and bought our tree it just felt strange. It really does still seem like it should be summer. The strange part....when Thanksgiving was over with I was really excited because I felt like spring was just around the corner. What?! I think living in Maryland is messing with me.

I have at least a dozen of these photos but usually Jos is happy.

The kids decorated the tree this year....no really....I sat on the couch and watched and they did it with Chris and you bet it looks awesome. Chris was concerned about how I would feel about it but I told him that how our Christmas trees looks is not a personal reflection of who I am.

Lets just say that Kate was just a little excited today. After we brought the boxes down stairs, and I was feeding Josalyn and Chris was MIA, she unloaded and unwrapped all our Christmas decorations. I couldn't get mad because she was just so excited and talking so fast about where we would put everything. For the past two days she keeps saying over and over again, "This is going to be the best Christmas ever!"

We got this little snow man out and Carter has found his new best friend. He dances and sings. It was really cute the first ten minutes but after he played with it all day by dinner time Kate was begging me to take it away from him. Like I said though he was so cute dancing with him. It melted my heart.

A Name

Our sweet baby Josalyn Holly was blessed all the way back on the first week of September. My wonderful friend took these pics just two weeks before she had her own baby. Thanks Di, as always they are beautiful. I wanted to wait for these pics before I posted. It was such a nice experience. My sister, Melynda, and dad came out for the special day and stayed an extra week and we loved every moment of it. Oh ya! and some how we roped them into re-tiling our bathroom. It was a sweet deal for us. Thanks guys!

Anyway here she is~

This is my girl. This picture sums her up. She has this piercing gaze and she uses it on everyone. She has bright, dark blue eyes, with eyelashes that reach her eyebrows. When she looks at you with those baby blues it feels like she can see into your soul. At least when she looks at me she seems that intense. I love it because it makes me feel like I can tell a little bit about who she is when she gives me those stares.

My amazing friend, Dessi, sewed Josalyn's dress and shoes. I hesitate to use her name because now everyone who knows her is going to be knocking down her door to make them something this gorgeous. She did two test dresses and at least three fittings to make sure she got it right. The most amazing part is she didn't use a pattern. I pulled up a picture on the internet and said this is what I want (with a few alterations) and she asked me a few questions and after some sweat, a little blood and luckily no tears I ended up with this beauty.....the dress not the baby.

Then when my sister Melynda came she made the headband and rosettes that went on her dress.

Remember when I posted three times ago and I said I can never get Kate and Carter to look at the camera at the same time well they finally did it. Hooray! Oh wait....now Josalyn isn't looking.

Love this!

After this experience needless to say I am feeling very loved. Three wonderful women whom I love dearly all had their hand in creating and preserving this day for us. Thank you so much ladies.

Josalyn's blessing was a day for me to remember what a real miracle it is to have her here. More important it reminded me that 1-she has been waiting a long time to come her and begin this experience and 2-it was a day for me to really remember and focus on my part in all of this. Which is to prepare her for this life and the challenges that will come and help her along to return to her Father in Heaven. Huge responsibility....that sometimes I get distracted from.

When a Baby Is Born

I'd rather be mother than anyone on earth
Bringing up a child or two of unpretentious birth...
I'd rather tuck a little child all safe and sound in bed
Than twine a chain of diamonds about my [carefree] head.
I'd rather wash a smudgy face with round, bright, baby eyes
Than paint a pageantry of fame or walk among the wise.
-Meredith Gray, from The Beauty of Motherhood

Two ladies in my life have just had or are having babies right now as I write this. The night before one of my best friends went in to have her baby I called to wish her good luck and hoped that everything would go well. As I said goodbye I felt this overwhelming surge of emotion for the experience she was going through and what was to come. Kate asked me why I was crying and couldn't really answer her. I felt so happy that she was going to meet her sweet baby boy in only a few hours and hold him in her arms. I felt awe at the fact that he had been waiting countless years to get to this point in his journey and that this life is something that we all wanted so badly that we cheered when we found out we would get to come to earth and obtain a body. It is such a sacred thing to have life, give life, and help life along in our own journey of life. And I was happy because she is like my sister and her joy was mine that night. Right now my other sister Jayanne is in the hospital having her baby boy-his name is Calvin...probably. I talked to her this morning as she was waiting to get into her room and we were talking about what a big day this is for him and how exciting it was. Chris would always remind when I was pregnant, and feeling overwhelmed and wondering why being pregnant had to be so hard, that you only have a baby a few times in your life. Being a mom is the hardest job you will ever have but will also bring the greatest blessings we can ever obtain in this life. I am grateful to be a mother here on earth and in the life to come.

Our Stake Relief Society President shared a thought with us at a meeting before the RS broadcast. She said that when Adam named Eve he called her that because he said, "she was the mother of all living". This was before Eve had ever bore a child or cared for one on earth, so whether you have given birth or not we are all mothers in different stages of our journey. I try to remember that this isn't just a job I have right now but an eternal part of my identity.

What, might you ask, happens when mom falls asleep on the couch and Dad is in charge?......

This! Same corner on the ottoman....twice.

And to end...

"She who can paint a masterpiece or write a book that will influence millions deserve the admiration and the plaudits of mankind; but she who rears successfully a family of healthy, beautiful sons and daughters, whose influence will be felt through generations to come,... long after paintings shall have faded, books and statues shall have decayed or shall have been destroyed, deserves the highest honor than man can give, and the choicest blessings of God. In her high duty and service to humanity..., she is co-partner with the Creator himself."
-President David O. McKay

Independence Is A Good Thing....Right?

She just walked away and never looked back. Sometimes now she even forgets to tell me bye. The first day we walk into school and I'm the one who starts crying....just a little. I was not prepared for this. I thought the day Kate went to school I would feel some relief at having the opportunity to get more things that are "necessary" done. Not so. I miss her so much. I feel like those four hours a day she disappears into some black hole and I have no idea what she is doing. She comes home and I try to give her the old Q & A but lets face it four-year-olds have way too much imagination to give you a simple, straight answer at what they did at school today. Now I have taken to pulling every paper out of her back pack and having her tell me one-by-one what they are and what she was doing when she made them. Am I OCD? DO I have a problem letting go or is this normal mom craziness? My friend tried to warn me about this but I didn't understand....until now. On the up side though...

She is happy! I can tell because she comes home super wired and excited about everything and then crashes-tears and all-around 4:00. I know she likes it and so I have to remind myself when I daydream about taking her out of school and selfishly making her stay home with me that this is good for her. She is growing and learning and doing all the wonderful things that she really needs to be doing right now. Then she comes home and her and I usually hatch up some sort of project to do together. This week we baked cake bites. Cooking is her favorite thing to do only third to looking through cookbooks for things to make (which completely reminds me of my sister Melynda) and, of course, watching Dora the Explorer.

(I have yet to get a picture of them both looking at me)

I might add that I am not the only one struggling with this possessiveness over Kate. Every time we take Kate into school Carter stands by the door that she walks into...and never looks back might I add...and sticks out his bottom lip and whispers "Kate" as he reaches out to her. Sometimes I am tempted to use this excuse to make her come and get back in the car with me but I remind myself and Carter that we will be coming to pick her up in four short...long...hours.

(Yup! I really do drop her off looking like this. This is Carter's handy work by-the-way he was pretty proud.)

The only upside to all of this school business is I get a lot more face time and play time with this>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

So at least there is a positive side to all this. Especially considering that this boy is in need of some boy play time. Chris and I realized this when the other day he came in wanting to play dress ups and brought us Kate's Cinderella dress which we kindly put on him because we don't care but we thought maybe it is time to invest in some different dress-ups for his sake. Lets face it someday he is going to care that he dressed up in his big sisters dress-ups and wore her princess high heels around the house.

This sweet thing gets more love and time with me than anyone so she isn't suffering. Lucky me! She is a good sport...usually....when I have to yank her out of bed at 7:30 am especially since she would like to be sleeping till 9:00.

It always heals my heart everyday that after she walks into class without of flinch or a sign of missing me that when I come to pick her up she always runs out the door with a great big smile and gives me a great big hug. In my mind it is her way of telling me that she wishes she could have been with me all along. :)

Bigger Than I'd Like

I don't usually do Birthday post but this one has be a little excited a little dazed and confused. I can't believe by baby girl is turning 4. I feel like she is really crossing over into big girl land she isn't that round little baby girl I've hauled around all these years. All though she still does have those sweet round cheeks I love. I will admit she is much more interesting now than ever before so I will share some of who she is now.

Newborn

One year

Two

Three

Four

Some of our birthday high lights are
1) Last night we went and took her birthday money that she received from her grandmas and let her pick out a toy. She picked out two princess dolls. Then when we got home she proceeded to ask me to wrap her dolls up so she could open them in the morning. I only did it because she asked and then put them on the table with her other present. Best part was in the morning when she opened her dolls up she acted so surprised that she had gotten them at all. There was lots of "oh my gosh" and jumping up and down involved. It was pretty funny.
2) After she opened her presents she was looking at them and playing with them and she stopped and said to me "mom thank you so much for getting me these presents". No prompting or anything. THAT is the best birthday gift I could ever be given.
3)When she told me she would rather have a babysitter tonight than have me stay home and watch a movie with her. Luckily I took her up on that offer and I got to go to the wonderful Relief Society Broadcast! (This was only a high light for me because it made me laugh. She is getting to the age ALREADY where other people are more interesting than MOM! No hard feelings though)
4)She graciously shared her new dollies with Carter
5)She came home with a back pack full of candy from the parade we went to this morning that we are now all stocked up for our soon to be coming trick-or-treaters.
6)She got to get her first happy meal today at McDonald's and I think I was more excited about it than she was. It reminded me of how excited I would get when I was little and they would hand you your very own box with all that sweet goodness inside that I now can't stand. Apparently neither can they because both of them hardly ate any of their food.
7)Tonight before bed I got to watch her snuggle with her baby sister right after she had finished snuggling with me. Then I tucked her in bed for the first time as my new little four-year-old.

Happy Birthday Kate!